durtbagz: don't call us easy

first and foremost, this afternoon at lunch, i spotted (actually, it was pointed out to me, i'll be honest) the rarest of rare scottsdale mullets. it was in the middle of scottsdale in a rather la-ti-da restaurant. completely shocking and rare. i was a bit impressed at its bravery.

okay, on to biznass. we're still looking into adding some software to the site that will allow you to create your own sign right there on the site. i just had a look at the bare bones version and it's ugly. that will not be what you all will see if, and this is a big IF (say it like bob does on Office Space), we figure out how to incorporate this into the site.

i know i talked about this the other day, but it's a really big issue for this company. think about it, (and maybe i'm wrong on this) but i feel that if you go on the site and you can immediately create your own sign, you are more likely to do so. especially if you don't have too many options to worry about as far as tools and colors are concerned. the signs are all the same shape and colors. really, you'd just need a few tools to create the symbols. once you've created it, you'd be able to save it and submit it right there, with the click of a button. it could be just that easy.

but there is a dark side to this. when something is that easy, people tend to take advantage. basically, i can see people getting on their and submitting signs that aren't exactly appropriate because it's so easily accessible. i'm picturing getting multiple signs a day involving penises, the f-word, and whatever else is not okay to put on a website catering to a somewhat decent society.

if we don't or can't go with this software, then we'll have to go with the original plan of accepting signs in multiple formats. like i said, i want everyone to be able to participate: if you can use 'the internets,' as our president calls it, you can participate in the competition at durtbagz. if you know how to find us on the web and discover the competition, you'll be able to submit your design in some way shape or form. the possibilities at this point are the following:

• draw on paper and fax it

• draw on paper, scan and email it

• create on applications on computer and email it

we'll have parameters that you will have to meet, depending on the method of submission. for instance, don't create a gigantic banner, saying, 'happy mother's day', fax it, and expect it to be on there for your mother to see. i'll tell you right now, i'm not having it. get your mother a card and take her to dinner like everyone else. seriously. and speaking of proud mothers, don't email me pictures of paris hilton to put on a sign either. although, i'm pretty sure celebutards will be a theme for the competition at some point.

there are a lot of factors that will go into determining how this will play out. i'm not exactly sure that the easiest is necessarily the best. (brittany spears is a perfect example of this theory: easiest girl around? sure, she is. the best singer around? um...does she sing?). however, is the attention span of my customer base so short that they won't want to take the time to draw out a sign for submission? i'm asking this question to you all: will your participation depend on the method of submission and the time required to create the sign? or are you interested in being a part of things no matter what? and what would sway you one way or the other? seriously, i'd like some answers...comment, people. i'm asking for your comments.

tomorrow is flake-off friday (already?!?) and i'll try to come up with something other than stories of my childhood. and i've added a button at the top right. click it so you'll be notified when i update this. up above it is a counter of how many people clicked on it. notice it's at zero...do you want to fix that or what?

durtbagz: the competition

i blacked out yesterday and agreed to get up and run with a friend at 5am this morning. actually, i think i remember me asking her if i could join in sometime, but i didn't think she'd take me seriously. since i've already been up for three hours, i decided to post while i'm on a roll before i crash in a few hours.
my friend is training for a half ironman, (yes, she is insane), and that got me thinking about competition and how the competition will work for durtbagz. my plan calls for the general public (aka, you) to create signs and post them on the website for voting. this sounds great in my head and the consensus among you all seems to be that it is something you want to participate in. this makes me happy. very happy. now, how do we make this theory into a reality?
how are you going to submit your sign? how are you going to create it so that it can be posted? we're working on the logistics of this right now, and to be honest, at this point, i'm just not sure how this will play out.
i got the idea for having the competition after reading an article on a company called threadless. it's a tee shirt company that has an ongoing competition for the designs that go on the shirts. they got the idea for incorporating the competition into their company after one of the founders won a tee shirt design competition. he's a graphic designer, as were the majority of the other contestants. his partner is some kind of IT nerd and they developed their own site and software for it (i mean it as a compliment being an IT nerd; they had over $20mill in rev last year). their competitions have grown tremendously since they began in 2000 and they now have hundreds of submissions a day. but...there is no way an average joe like me could submit a design. when i researched what they required as far as the format of the file and the blah blah be blah ba blah...no idea. i love their idea. their requirements for being able to participate are ricockulous.
i want everyone to be able to participate, whether you know how to create the signs on the computer or not. i don't want their to be issues with people wanting to participate and not being able to because they may not be 'tech savvy'. if you have an idea, i want to see it and i want everyone else to see it too. so at this point, the options are to submit them as either drawings you have created on your computer on paint or any form that is more advanced than that (i use paint so you know most people 10 years younger than me are pros at it). or to literally draw them and scan them into a .jpg to submit.
my web design firm is investigating incorporating a software that could allow you to actually draw on a 'pad' on the site with your mouse. in theory, you'd be able to save the image and submit it, right there. don't' get excited because i think the possibility of this happening is slim to none, (at least right now, in a few years it will be very likely).
my goal is to make it as easy as possible for everyone to participate, no matter if you are a pro on photoshop or just like to draw with a pencil. hopefully, we can accommodate everyone.
okay, i'm off to take a nap. sorry this post isn't that funny, but bags is a serious bidness and i am hurting for sleep big time.

durtbagz: signs, signs, everywhere signs

first i have to tell something funny. over the weekend i was with my grandpa who turns 91 next month. i learned that when i was a kid, he owned a hog farm in kansas and they used some technique that he learned from hog farmers in scottland and holland. he was the first one in the US to use this type of technology and as a result, would travel around the midwest to the ag-schools and lecture...on manure. finally, an explanation for my obsession with the word poop.

today, i spent the better part of an hour, tallying the votes for signs from the survey. as it turns out...just about every sign was voted for at least once. there are a few that stand out as winners (crosswalk with pedestrian reaching for other pedestrian's butt is clearly the number one, and mullets were a big favorite). so this tells me one of two things: either all of the signs are that funny or none of them are very funny.

well...wtf is funny, anyway? (i'm listening to my AC/DC station on pandora so if you sense some sass...). i mean, is a wheelchair rolling downhill into an open alligator mouth funny? hell to the yeah, it is. why? because when in the world would that ever happen? maybe in some evil zoo somewhere, but seriously? come on, meow. i don't have ESPN, i'm not a psychic, making these signs as a prediction of the future. what you see in this sign is MADE UP.

is a sign with fat bathroom symbols funny? ooohhhhh yyyeeeaaahhh. why? for the very opposite reason: this picture is a snapshot of reality. have you been to a national park or disneyland lately? i have. and this is what a realistic version of that sign would look like. (i switched my pandora station to gypsy kings...still sassy). do i laugh at them in real life? no. but what's wrong with a little dose of reality? oh, it's okay for 'oilslick' to call someone 'firecrotch' on tv, though...

and what about mullets (pronounced 'mu'-LAY)? mullets are universally funny. if you don't know what i'm talking about or what they look like, just visit your local cabela's or bass pro shop, (commonly referred to as pro bass). let me ask you this: how many lawyers, doctors, or people in the corporate world do you know with a mullet? what? did you say none-point-none? you don't say...yet, it's okay for everyone to laugh at those, even though when you see one, you think of a redneck or a trailer park. whatever, it's true. (aqualung is playing now and seems to have done the trick). just like it's okay for everyone to laugh at fat bathroom people, just like it's okay to laugh at a wheelchair grinding down a rail at a skateboard park.

picture these on bags on college campuses and high school quads. think of them on tee shirts or stickers on bikes, cars, skateboards and just about anywhere in your average ski/surf town. mean? no. wrong? quite possibly. funny? i hope.